hotel truths

as i'm BACK on the road (and spending my first night in a hotel in awhile, incidentally, i thought i'd share what i've observed to be some universal truths of hotel life for the lonely traveller:

it's not home: no matter how nice your heavenly bed/shower/ironing board are, it just doesn't matter. it's a lonely hotel room you likely wouldn't pay for out of pocket if the company wasn't footing the bill. nothing beats sitting around + watching TV with a loved one, or sleeping on a friend's lumpy couch. it's not a cheapness thing, it's comfort (warmth) thing.

room number: i am HORRIBLE with keeping random numbers in my head. but for some reason, for the duration of my stay, the hotel room # is BURNED in my memory. i guess it's so when you come back from the hotel dinner after having imbibed a BIT too much, you know where to go.

the darkness: NOTHING beats this. hotel rooms always have those drapes that can COMPLETLEY block out a supernova (or more simply, all outside light). it's a brilliant thing to fall asleep to, a disturbing thing to wake up in the middle of the night ("where am i?" i have teetered on the brink of insanity some mornings when my eyes open and there is completely dark, "oh no! i've gone blind!"), and makes it extremely hard to WANT to get up in the morning. which leads me the last "hotel truth"...

the wake up call: this is BRILLIANT. i, like 93% of the human population, am a perpetual (and habitual) snoozer, no matter where the alarm clock is strategically positioned (i have yet to test my waking mettle against clocky...birthday present hint hint). but for some reason, a wake up call signals the immediate expectations of others, even though it is probably an (automated) stranger, which you HAVE to get up for. to make it worse, i usually wake up about 6 minutes before the wake up call + stare at the phone in trepidation.

and those are my hotel truths. did i miss anything?